living in now

safety

the “ok” suit is temporary

penbrydd:
Your periodic reminder that in people who have been subject to threats and punishment for having emotional responses or ‘inappropriate’ facial expressions, panic attacks look different.

They may look like the person has become calmer and less involved, dismissive, even. Some people become intensely subservient and silent. Some become catatonic.
Panic doesn’t always involve screaming, crying, and obvious signs of distress. It involves an extreme form of the person’s fear response – which can be altered by circumstance, ability, and what they’ve learnt to fear.
Which is to say, it’s not your place to decide someone isn’t having a panic attack, when they’ve told you that’s what’s happening.

curlyspoonie:
Oh, so that time I just couldn’t move or talk or anything and was basically catatonic was a really thing? Why am I constantly finding out that experiences I’ve had are not just me???

hollowedskin:
See also: being totally fine until reaching somewhere safe like your car, your house or your room.

That also includes seeming totally fine to YOURSELF. The amount of times i’ve been like, oh wow that went better than expected then closed the door and lost my fucking shit while going “but i was fine????”…
it’s a safety thing. you weren’t safe in public to be seen with emotions you could be punished for, and now you are.

genuinely being ok

is not the same

as holding your “ok” suit

together until you’re

somewhere private

responsibility cooperation manipulation personas understanding failure cognitive distortions happiness detachment perception validation delusion flow commitment externalization grounding setbacks resentment authenticity journey kindness condemnation struggle self care denial goals persistence conscious living reactivity natural connection soul death personal responsibility breakup self love bitterness self discovery life abundance in your feelings action change progress mindset triggers suffering gratitude anxiety existing disqualifying the positive self acceptance beliefs self knowledge care solitude growth self control love contentment insanity breathe centering damage momentum subconscious processing feelings path of growth healing self consciousness resetting attachments choice now vulnerability lessons success meditation destination definition counterdependence actions impermanence openness relationships self definition initiative self awareness appreciation safety self programming challenge worth isolation belief convictions reality self talk projection complaining freedom mindfulness truth challenges suppression intrinsic intimacy grief thoughts stumbles boundaries wisdom support focus pain strength hope supply unstuck expectation triggered peace worry perfection respect trust narcissism expectations fear weakness reset honesty mistakes adapt trauma response blind spots insecurity death self reliance attention grace judgment stuck toxicity hurt celebration dependence present forgiveness control anger codependency learning choices rabbits compassion acceptance self deception consequences accountability magnification people pleasing attachment communication self forgiveness consistency
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