living in now

personas

the “ok” suit is temporary

penbrydd:
Your periodic reminder that in people who have been subject to threats and punishment for having emotional responses or ‘inappropriate’ facial expressions, panic attacks look different.

They may look like the person has become calmer and less involved, dismissive, even. Some people become intensely subservient and silent. Some become catatonic.
Panic doesn’t always involve screaming, crying, and obvious signs of distress. It involves an extreme form of the person’s fear response – which can be altered by circumstance, ability, and what they’ve learnt to fear.
Which is to say, it’s not your place to decide someone isn’t having a panic attack, when they’ve told you that’s what’s happening.

curlyspoonie:
Oh, so that time I just couldn’t move or talk or anything and was basically catatonic was a really thing? Why am I constantly finding out that experiences I’ve had are not just me???

hollowedskin:
See also: being totally fine until reaching somewhere safe like your car, your house or your room.

That also includes seeming totally fine to YOURSELF. The amount of times i’ve been like, oh wow that went better than expected then closed the door and lost my fucking shit while going “but i was fine????”…
it’s a safety thing. you weren’t safe in public to be seen with emotions you could be punished for, and now you are.

genuinely being ok

is not the same

as holding your “ok” suit

together until you’re

somewhere private

kindness momentum response self programming cognitive distortions accountability perception belief anxiety respect strength contentment blind spots denial grace grief projection truth control stumbles wisdom unstuck love breakup freedom failure centering acceptance progress existing trauma externalization in your feelings convictions actions isolation self consciousness initiative triggered fear worry magnification triggers path of growth codependency cooperation self awareness journey focus connection boundaries goals expectations communication intrinsic self definition complaining people pleasing change thoughts abundance compassion now resentment mistakes grounding vulnerability pain subconscious insanity death present success self care weakness perfection appreciation beliefs self deception reactivity consistency self reliance feelings intimacy persistence attachments natural disqualifying the positive stuck breathe trust suffering learning anger bitterness healing delusion peace forgiveness solitude manipulation condemnation personas flow hope conscious living self acceptance narcissism action life support validation expectation rabbits choice mindfulness attachment commitment destination adapt challenges understanding reality impermanence self discovery definition consequences gratitude worth judgment struggle openness lessons responsibility supply authenticity insecurity self love self talk challenge self forgiveness honesty meditation detachment mindset growth damage self control processing care happiness resetting suppression attention reset celebration self knowledge soul death counterdependence personal responsibility setbacks relationships dependence toxicity safety hurt choices
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