living in now

personas

the “ok” suit is temporary

penbrydd:
Your periodic reminder that in people who have been subject to threats and punishment for having emotional responses or ‘inappropriate’ facial expressions, panic attacks look different.

They may look like the person has become calmer and less involved, dismissive, even. Some people become intensely subservient and silent. Some become catatonic.
Panic doesn’t always involve screaming, crying, and obvious signs of distress. It involves an extreme form of the person’s fear response – which can be altered by circumstance, ability, and what they’ve learnt to fear.
Which is to say, it’s not your place to decide someone isn’t having a panic attack, when they’ve told you that’s what’s happening.

curlyspoonie:
Oh, so that time I just couldn’t move or talk or anything and was basically catatonic was a really thing? Why am I constantly finding out that experiences I’ve had are not just me???

hollowedskin:
See also: being totally fine until reaching somewhere safe like your car, your house or your room.

That also includes seeming totally fine to YOURSELF. The amount of times i’ve been like, oh wow that went better than expected then closed the door and lost my fucking shit while going “but i was fine????”…
it’s a safety thing. you weren’t safe in public to be seen with emotions you could be punished for, and now you are.

genuinely being ok

is not the same

as holding your “ok” suit

together until you’re

somewhere private

detachment change externalization consistency personal responsibility impermanence freedom trauma respect cooperation support success thoughts self reliance wisdom suppression breakup intrinsic now toxicity self deception focus persistence action celebration stuck complaining consequences choices stumbles progress boundaries setbacks natural responsibility self knowledge projection challenge reactivity manipulation peace conscious living accountability honesty expectation in your feelings soul death self consciousness cognitive distortions beliefs magnification worry commitment challenges gratitude perception death feelings healing centering care self programming response grace connection journey self talk expectations blind spots path of growth grounding unstuck authenticity hurt grief anger safety triggered attachments adapt judgment actions vulnerability bitterness flow control reset lessons attachment contentment definition convictions breathe kindness mistakes denial personas narcissism momentum self discovery goals weakness processing trust truth learning self acceptance communication isolation growth destination appreciation struggle suffering understanding existing self care anxiety insecurity self control worth happiness damage failure abundance love subconscious insanity fear counterdependence disqualifying the positive self forgiveness self definition strength belief self awareness present mindset triggers people pleasing initiative forgiveness hope codependency resentment perfection compassion reality intimacy relationships validation delusion attention acceptance dependence life solitude choice rabbits condemnation supply resetting openness self love meditation pain mindfulness
Subscribe to our newsletter
The most recent posts emailed to you every week
All rights reserved © 2023